how would you fit it in there?
Im going to my best friend’s birthday party, we gonna party from dusk till dawn like a coupla Inglorious Bastards. something like that…
Rocket: Yeah. Budd, honey, uh,
the toilet is at it again.
There’s shitty water all over the floor.
Budd: OK… Rocket.
I’ll clean it up.
Rocket: Mm-hmm.
Budd punches her hard in the jaw
Budd: I Quit
====================
Vernita Green: So when do we do this?
The Bride: It all depends.
When do you want to die?
Tomorrow? The day after tomorrow?
Vernita Green: How about tonight, bitch?
The Bride: Splendid. Where?
Vernita Green: There’s a baseball diamond where I coach
Litte League about a mile from here.
We meet there around 3:00
in the morning dressed all in black.
Your hair in a black stocking.
And we have us a knife fight.
We won’t be bothered.
Now…
…I have to fix Nikkis cereal.
The Bride: Wait a second. I’ve never heard of that brand of cereal before.
Vernita Green: It’s Nikki’s favorite.
The Bride: Do you mind if I try some?
Vernita Green: (finishing pouring Nikki’s bowl) Not at all, go right ahead.
The Bride: (finishing off Niki’s cereal) Mmmmmm this IS some tasty cereal!
I wanna taste these cereals too…Kaboom, Fruite Brute or Lucky Charms?
[quote=“zeppelincheetah”]
====================
Vernita Green: So when do we do this?
The Bride: It all depends.
When do you want to die?
Tomorrow? The day after tomorrow?
Vernita Green: How about tonight, bitch?
The Bride: Splendid. Where?
Vernita Green: There’s a baseball diamond where I coach
Litte League about a mile from here.
We meet there around 3:00
in the morning dressed all in black.
Your hair in a black stocking.
And we have us a knife fight.
We won’t be bothered.
Now…
…I have to fix Nikkis cereal.
The Bride: Wait a second. I’ve never heard of that brand of cereal before.
Vernita Green: It’s Nikki’s favorite.
The Bride: Do you mind if I try some?
Vernita Green: (finishing pouring Nikki’s bowl) Not at all, go right ahead.
The Bride: (finishing off Niki’s cereal) Mmmmmm this IS some tasty cereal!
[/quote]
Hahahahah
[quote=“Bad Max”]
He forgot also Inglorious Bastards
[/quote]
No, I didn’t forget that, that hasn’t even been filmed yet!!
nope it hasn’t. but yet you mentionned MBF’s B-day, which wasn’t quite achieved either, and TR and NBK, which aren’t 100% QT movies…so yeah, you could have used IB. funny as fuckin hell anyway!
[quote=“Tristan”]
nope it hasn’t. but yet you mentionned MBF’s B-day, which wasn’t quite achieved either, and TR and NBK, which aren’t 100% QT movies…so yeah, you could have used IB. funny as fuckin hell anyway!
[/quote]
All the one’s I mentioned were filmed. I mentioned all the one’s QT wrote, obviously I missed out From Dusk Till Dawn. Oh fucking well.
didn’t mean no offense man, keep it cool…
I was trying to improve your joke, that’s it.
[quote=“Tristan”]
didn’t mean no offense man, keep it cool…
I was trying to improve your joke, that’s it.
[/quote]
Sorry, I was in a very bad place when I wrote that.
lol, I thought you were having your monthlies…my physic teacher used to say that:
"if you have a GIRL PROBLEM, I allow you to go to the bathroom."
he was an asshole.
[quote=“Tristan”]
lol, I thought you were having your monthlies…my physic teacher used to say that:
"if you have a GIRL PROBLEM, I allow you to go to the bathroom."
he was an asshole.
[/quote]
Now that is something you ain’t never gonna hear in Kill Bill.
why not?
I could totally see O-Ren talking that way…
O-Ren -Are ya fuckin done with your peperroni pizza?
Bodyguard -Mmm, boss, I don’t feel so good…I think this retard Charlie Brown put too much hot sauce on it…
O-Ren -And you Sophie, still eating?
Sophie -Sorry honey, that pizza is really terrible…And you know it’s not the perfect time to eat stuff like that for me right now…
O-Ren -Well, if you have some girl problem, you can go to the bathroom. Just watch out for BLEEEP. I heard she’s having her monthlies too, she’s probably pretty pissed off.
[quote=“Tristan”]
O-Ren -Well, if you have some girl problem, you can go to the bathroom. Just watch out for BLEEEP. I heard she’s having her monthlies too, she’s probably pretty pissed off.
[/quote]
Ha, well yes. But Bea probably wouldn’t have monthlies since her gonads stopped working, according to Buck.
excellent point, hadn’t thought of that…
I was wondering how she didn’t get pregnant - I mean, I seriously doubt that guys like buck bothered to “pull out”. That would be pretty hard to explain how a woman in a coma got pregnant.
how the fuck could she get pregnant if her gonads stopped working???
It makes you feel sorry for her, knowing throughout the films that not only does she believes her daughter is dead, but she also won’t be able to have anymore.
Kill Bill epilogue.
“Mommy, can I have a little sister or brother?”
Bill:Can’t we just get along?
Beatrix: You know, I was thinking the exactly same thing (both start to cry)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Badly Dubbed)
Johnny Mo:I’m so bad, I can kick my own ass!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Budd drives up to The Mcdonalds drive-through window)
Worker:How can I help you?
Budd:I’ll get two big macs, a apple pie, and a diet coke
Worker:Do you want fries with that?
Budd:Are blondes whores?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Bill catches Budd & Beatrix in the bed together)
Bill:What the hell man?
Budd:Revenge is dish best served cold
Bill:What are you talking about?
Budd:Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite? (Budd stands up while naked)
Bill:Jesus christ, cover yourself
Budd: What’s wrong, Jealous?
Bill: I’ll see both of you in court (runs out the room sobbing like a little girl)
Bill: Do you find me sadistic? You know, I bet I could fry an egg on your head right now, if I wanted to. You know, Kiddo, I’d like to believe that you’re aware enough even now to know that there’s nothing sadistic in my actions. Well, maybe towards those other… jokers, but not you. No Kiddo, at this moment…
The Bride: [interrupting] Jesus Bill, are we still in fucking high school? Stop calling me by my last name. I’m The Bride, so that’s what you call me. You know, that or, uh, Beatrix, or uh, Mommy, or Black Mamba if you’re not into the whole brevity thing.
The Bride: You can relax for now. I’m not going to murder you in front of your daughter.
Copperhead: You lying bitch, that’s exactly what you do!
The Bride: I apologise.
Coppehead: Accepted.
Hattori Hanzo: What brings you to Okinawa?
The Bride: I’m here to see a woman.
Hattori Hanzo: Oh yeah? You have a friend living in Okinawa?
The Bride: Not quite.
Hattori Hanzo: Not a friend?
The Bride: She’s my lover.
Hattori Hanzo: Who is she, may I ask?
The Bride: Sheronda.
Hattori Hanzo: [Serious, switches to Japanese] Why are you here?
The Bride: [Japanese] I need Japanese steel.
Hattori Hanzo: [Japanese] Why do you need Japanese steel?
The Bride: [Japanese] I have a pussy to penetrate.
Hattori Hanzo: [English] She must have a biiiiig pussy if you need Hattori Hanzo’s steel.
The Bride: [English] … Huge.
[Hattori Hanzo gets annoyed]
The Bride: [in Japanese] Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you’ve lost. They belong to me now.
[in English]
The Bride: EXCEPT YOU, QUENTIN! You stay right where you are… I want to get a shot of you there to prove to those internet fuckers that you really were in this scene.
O-Ren Ishii: Silly Caucasian girl likes to play with Samurai swords.
The Bride: Hey, if you have a better way of pleasuring yourself, I’m all ears [turns to Sheronda] lay still will you…
Sheronda: Are we in Hollywood?
Hattori Hanzo: For those regarded as warriors, when engaged in combat the vanquishing of thine enemy can be the warrior’s only concern. Suppress all human emotion and compassion. Kill whoever stands in thy way, even if that be Lord God, or Buddha himself. This truth lies at the heart of the art of combat.
The Bride: Dude, that rhymes, you’re amazing!
[Hattori Hanzo gets annoyed]
Copperhead: So I suppose it’s a little late for an apology, huh?
The Bride: You suppose correctly.
Copperhead: You have every right to want to get even.
The Bride: No. No. To get even? Even-Steven?
Copperhead: [giggles] Even Stevens, haha, I love that show. Shia LaBeouf is cute.
The Bride: Yeah, he was awesome in Transformers - the only good thing in it.
Copperhead: Well apart from the action, oh and when that Kill Bill theme came on randomly in the scene with that yellow car.
The Bride: Nah, I thought that was a fucking horrible reference, I wanted to leave the cinema right there and then.
Copperhead: What cinema were you at?
The Bride: This really awesome movie house in Paris.
Copperhead: Oh that’s Shosanna’s movie joint. I hear they show some pretty cool films. I ain’t never watched one there myself. How are they?
The Bride: They’re good.
Copperhead: Mind if I come along with you next time? 'cos my good husband Dr Bell’s not a cineast, which pretty much makes me not a cineast, but I do love watching a good movie.
The Bride: No.
[tear runs down Copperhead’s face]
The Bride: How did you find me?
Bill: Winston found you.
The Bride: How the fuck did he find me?
Bill: That’s what Winston does. He finds people who don’t want to be found
Hattori Hanzo: I’m done doing what I swore an oath to God 28 years ago to never do again. I’ve created, "something that kills people."
The Bride: Don’t be so hard on yourself. Katana’s don’t kill people, people kill people.
Hattori Hanzo: [mutters to bald guy beside him] That’s it, I’ve had enough of this bitch.
[camera pans away, violence occurs offscreen]
Copperhead: So when do we do this?
The Bride: It all depends on when do you want to die? Tomorrow? The day after tomorrow?
Copperhead: [giggles] I loved that film. Jake Gyllenhaal is cute.
The Bride: Really? Roland Emmerich is a fucking douche. 10,000 BC sucks dick.
[tear runs down Copperhead’s face]
[the Bride drags Buck’s head to the doorjam]
The Bride: [screams] Where’s Bill?
[slam]
The Bride: Where’s Bill?
[slam]
Buck: [weakly] Please stop hitting me…
The Bride: WHERE’S BILL?
[slam]
Buck: I-I… wait, let me make a phone call
[makes a phone call]
Buck: Hello, Winston?
Boss Benta: Boss Tanaka! What is the meaning of this outburst? This is a time for celebration.
Boss Tanaka: And what exactly are we celebrating? The perversion of our illustrious council?
Boss Honda: Tanaka, have you gone mad? I will not tolerate this! You’re disrespecting our sister! Apologize!
O-Ren Ishii: Tanaka-san, of what perversion do you speak?
Boss Tanaka: My father…
[to Benta]
Boss Tanaka: along with yours…
[to Ozawah]
Boss Tanaka: and along with yours, started this council. And while you laugh like stupid donkeys, they weep in the afterlife over the perversion committed today.
Boss Ozawah: Outrageous! Tanaka, it is you who insults this council!
[Throws rag at him]
Boss Ozawah: Bastard!
Boss Tanaka: Would you say I’m… INGLORIOUS?
[turns towards camera and smiles]