Very nice Mr. Crazi, I like it. Your version is even more sitcom-like.
OK, here’s another excerpt, this time it’s a cold open (also called a teaser). And just in case you readers don’t know what this is: It’s a little scene or sequence at the beginning of a sitcom that has often nothing to do with the rest of the show, it’s often used in many sitcoms.
- INT. Bruce’s room – night (teaser)
Bruce is sleeping in his bed, humming the theme from „Knight Rider“, the door is open. George passes by and notices the humming.
GEORGE
(quietly)
Hey Paul, check this out!
Paul joins George.
PAUL
What?
GEORGE
Little Brucey is humming in sleep.
PAUL
Ah, that’s cute. What’s he humming?
GEORGE
I think it’s the Knight Rider theme.
PAUL
(amused)
Oh yeah, it is. Hah, only Bruce.
GEORGE
Yeah.
Bruce stops humming. Just as Paul and George are about to leave he starts again, humming the theme from „Super Mario Bros.“.
PAUL
Hey, a new melody.
GEORGE
What’s that?
PAUL
Oh I know, that’s the Super Mario Brothers theme.
GEORGE
You’re right, it is.
PAUL
Wonder what he’ll hum after that.
GEORGE
I bet you it’s a TV or movie theme.
PAUL
What?
GEORGE
I bet you five bucks it’s either a TV or movie theme.
PAUL
Well I bet you five bucks it’s another videogame theme.
GEORGE
You’re on.
Bruce stops humming.
GEORGE
Come on Bruce, hum for me. Hum a nice TV theme, you love TV.
PAUL
No Bruce, you love videogames, make a nice videogame hum for me.
…
Hum for me baby.
…
GEORGE
OK, I guess he won’t hum anymore.
PAUL
Yeah.
They leave. Shortly after doing so Bruce starts humming the „Star Wars“ theme. Paul and Bruce come running back.
GEORGE
(loud)
Ha! That’s Star Wars! You owe me five bucks!
Bruce weaks up from the screaming.
PAUL
(loud)
Damn!
GEORGE
Hahaha.
Paul is disappointed and gives George a note.
PAUL
Here you go. We will do this again tomorrow, you hear? You have to give me a chanche to win my money back.
GEORGE
Alright.
Paul hands George the money. George is happy, waves the note in the air.
GEORGE
Haha, I won. I won, I won, I won.
(to Bruce)
Thanks Bruce. Good night, and may the force be with you!
George leaves.
PAUL
Damn you stupid Star Wars dork!
Paul slams the door close. Bruce sits in bed, startled.
BRUCE
What the hell was that?
Opening theme
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@ My concept: It’s just a flatshare sitcom, there is no “unique selling point”, a negative fact pointed out by my script consultant. But then again, what was the “special” in Friends (Friends share time and banter) or King of Queens (Husband and wife with father)? I like it how it is: 3 friends, one of them with a often visiting girlfriend, (Sarah) live their life and use banter and bickering to get along in many funny situations.