1. you don’t have to force your characters to say each others names in the opening it sound incredably fake. you’ve got 30 pages to do that
2. when your writing pretend that you have never seen a tarantino film. i say this because that’s what your dialogue sounds like bad tarantino dialogue. give your character there own unique voice.
3. think visually. i can’t stand to watch a bunch of people sitting at a resturant talking about bullshit, it’s boring. make them do something. (i think that the start of reservoir dogs is boring that’s why i fast forward it)
4. think originally. i mean come on all this is is a bad reservoir dogs. i’m sure your capable of thinking some cool original shit up.
5. read about a thousand books on screenwriting. Use a screenwriting program(final draft is great) you can download them anywhere.
6. keep writing, you’ll only get better.
ps. if i was you i would burn this and start something more unique and original. but you don’t have to agree with anything i said because i’m just a stupid 15 year old
